DATELINE: GAY HUMOR
Michael Sam and Jason Collins in Pre-Retirement Mode
Gay NBA player Jason Collins is throwing in the trick towel.
The former Boston Celtics player who came out of the closet to the rush of product endorsements and a plethora of public appearances, now, as it must for all, face the fame-killing moment of retirement.
It’s always a bit of a shock to be put out to pasture at age 35. However, Collins never played much, spending his ostensible career on the bench, keeping his keester warm.
Collins had a 13-year career, notable for nothing much, but still made the cover of Sports Illustrated for the achievement of being in the center ring of a media circus. He will now tour the country every summer as grand marshal of gay pride parades wherever a handful of celebrants can be mustered.
Of course, being put out to stud may be a blessing in disguise for a handsome, attractive young man in today’s gay world. Free drinks at any gay bar in America will be part of his NBA retirement package.
His main competition now will be football player Michael Sam, another handsome, attractive young man. Throw in the popularity of black athletes in the gay world, and you have a tandem that could rival Brady and Gronk for touchdowns in the red zone.
Sam and Collins may want to team up and produce a workout video for adoring fans. If it’s on Amazon Instant Video, we know how popular they will be in the privacy of your home.