Trump’s Sports Liaison

DATELINE: Last of the Ninth?

 Golf Duffer & Liaison.

Trump just canceled throwing out the first pitch next week at the Red Sox-Yankees game at Yankee Stadium. Is it going to be too hot? Or did Secret Service say that they couldn’t protect him? Trump joked last year that he needed a suit of armor for such an appearance.

Who is setting up these faux sports events for Trump?

You may be surprised or not: according to Abigail Hess, intrepid CNBC reporter, it is none other than Rudy Giuliani’s 32-year old son.

Yes, if you are puzzled  why Trump has had more sports involvement lately, you could look no deeper than Andrew Giuliani whose job, as special sports liaison, is to ferret out aging, dumb jocks who support Trump without question.

So, Bob Cousy of the Celtics receives a Medal of Freedom. Some teams are invited to the White House, and others are disparaged. Blame it on a Giuliani advisor.

Daddy Rudy claims there is no pay-off or pay-back to hire the son of the President’s personal lawyer at $100,000 grand per year. Rudy notes it is a “nice” job  to locate aged in the wood sports figures for Trump to play golf with (Brett Favre only this week), and sound them out for public statements of support.

NASCAR is no accident for Trump. He knows all about the Confederate flags on race cars because of Andrew Giuliani, and there is a safe spot and sport for Trump to canoodle with unquestioned stars of the past.

Next time there is a loser in the White House, you know he will look for victory in former sports winners.

 

Early Retirees in Sports

DATELINE: HUMOR!affluenza sufferer

Few athletes nowadays would ever think to take the Joe DiMaggio route of retiring at 36 years because he was starting to lose his edge as a superstar.

Good grief! Today they will play till 50 if the millions of dollars hold out. Take A-Rod who might retire if he were not looking at $25million per year in forfeit.

They will fight to stay on the field to the bitterest end, like Brett Favre, because diminished skills and embarrassing lack of ability does not compute when the paycheck is automatically put into the checking account.

Peyton Manning had his greatest season, but looked old and feeble in the championship game. Some fans are speculating that he will hang it up rather than face another season ender like this.

Baloney! Manning knows where the dollar signs are buried in the Money Pit. He sees his pizza endorsements and car driving down the commercial highway as something he won’t give up till he has to.

Tom Brady has frequently said he loves the game and the competition and will play till he is 50. Well, Tom, even Clint had to retire Dirty Harry when the character was well past the age when cops are allowed to gum their food.

Retirement is a dirty word when big bucks are at stake, or an ego is on the line. We found colleagues making the largest paydays in their lives refusing to step aside, despite diminished skills and waning interest.

The only factor for retirement is when no one wants you and no one will pay you. In sports, that day seems far away and leaving at your best is a lost art.