DATELINE: Round & Round We Go!
In the thirteenth fake cycle season, Ancient Aliens seems to have come full circle. Have we not already seen an episode on Area 52? Have we actually seen many episodes about the secret installation?
Oh, wait, you are one step ahead of us. Area 52 is ahead of the game. Area 51 is so passe, apparently, as if it really was anything but a show horse to throw us off.
We were confused by that 1947 Roswell newspaper headline that seems to appear somewhere in every episode of the series. It’s like a Hitchcock cameo from one of his movies.
Ancient Aliens has moved on to underground bunkers and high-speed rail stations that will carry you anywhere fast. You can’t get a monthly pass, and no one ever sees the train. There are deep underground tubes on Long Island to Montauk Point, and from Roswell to Area 51 in Nevada.
These rails beneath the surface of America are more advanced than the newest rapid transit tubes. You can now de-centralize the alien secrets. Smaller bits of the spaceship are back engineered, and they are sent where no man or journalist can go, nor can the rest of us.
Government agencies are no longer viable. To keep the snooping public out of it, private companies are now in charge of research and development. This undercuts Freedom of Information seekers—and producers of the cottage industry of secret alien hideaways on TV shows.
Apparently the government is also back-engineering an Egyptian pharaoh’s time travel chair.
The show’s episodes for this summer will continue later after a hiatus, but they stressed the government research into telekinesis, mind control, and other devices are the keys to unlocking the universe. Stay tuned for ESP reports on the next go-round.
DATELINE: Post Suspended Animation
We can’t see him. He’s like a tree in the forest.
Tom Brady returned to Foxboro as the Invisible Man. He may only look like Claude Rains when he is wrapped up like a mummy.
No one can see him. Another nefarious plot by Swami Belichick has rendered Tom Brady with a cloaking device. Captain Kirk never saw a cloaking device like this one.
Tom is the new Area 51. We know he’s there. People have taken pictures, but he melts away. You will be forced to ask Patriot players to take us to your leader, but it is more likely the Patriots have seen little green men rather than Tom Brady.
Everyone denies seeing him lately.
When Tom showed up at Gillette after his four game exile to Elba, the media was blind to his presence. Players swore that, if he was back, they had neither seen nor heard him.
Tom Who is the new mantra.
It works too. If teamwork is all, and there is no savior coming down from heaven to save them, then you will not take note of Tom Brady. Was he absent for a month of Sundays? It does not matter.
No teammate will acknowledge that he was gone, or that he has returned. They won three games as a team, not with Tom Brady’s replacements. The next man always steps up to do the job. And, now, with all the young QBs in hospital condition, Tom Brady will step up and step in.
No big deal. Tom who? Oh, that guy from La Dolce Vita who was hounded by Paparazzi. He’s around here somewhere.
DATELINE: Deja Vu
Lazar and Snowden: Government Overseers?
If the latest whistleblower (and some claim traitor) seems to ring a familiar note, you may be thinking you’ve seen this guy before.
Indeed, you may have if you followed the 1990s face of Bob Lazar who claimed to have worked at the notorious Area 51, a secret government base where captured flying saucers were being back-engineered.
The face of Edward Snowden, the man who revealed the secret government program to monitor your phone calls, bears a resemblance to other whistleblower.
One is dismissed as a crank, thoroughly discredited for the silliness of his claim. The latest has won recognition at the presidential level as a man who exposed Mr. Obama as the new Nixon.
Most interesting about these two men, born a generation apart, is that they insist that the government has the power to render individuals into dog meat. Lazar and Snowden both attended, but never graduated from, junior colleges. They seem to have climbed into positions of power and authority without qualifications.
Perhaps the biggest scandal is how the NSA, CIA, or other secret programs recruits its workers.
Both men are individualists who answer to the greater public knowledge—to the utter destruction of their personal lives. Indeed, Snowden seems to think a Jason Bourne-style assassin may be hot on his trail.
The theme here is one fiction writers love: a government so powerful and so secretive that we will never believe the worst because it enters the realm of fantasy and lunacy.
Whistleblowers are never popular—and seldom much heralded even by supporters. Just ask John Dean who brought down Richard Nixon.