Nutcase Shooter in Trump’s Camp

DATELINE: Trump Rallies the Troops

Cruz Trump Supporter

President Trump promised more federal aid for mentally ill people after the Florida shooter was revealed to be a troubled youth named Nikolas Cruz.

In his inimitable half-baked style, President Trump failed to mention the word ‘gun’ in his speech to the nation, but he did mention crazy people. He must have crazy on the mind.

This apparently was before he had learned that the shooter posted a picture on Instagram wearing one of Trump’s campaign hats, the notorious ‘Make America Great Again’ chapeaux.

Yes, you guessed it, Nikolas Cruz tried to make America great again by killing 17 people. Trump would not want you to know that he was a member of a white supremacist group,as well as a Trump supporter. That makes both Trump and Cruz two-time losers. Too bad we can’t deport those people.

Alas, Trump supporters are the salt of the earth and are genuine American citizens. Because the 19-year-old couldn’t buy a gun in Florida he went for an assault rifle. It’s much easier to shoot, buy, and use. He was partial to merchandise with American logos. Hence, he posted a photo wearing a bandana over his face with stripes on it.

As for more money for mentally ill Americans, already cut out of the health plan proposed by Trump, we think it is a good idea to have more money for the crazy people who voted for Mr. Trump. We can’t think of a group that needs more mental health than Trump supporters.

We can hardly wait for Sarah Shuckabee Slanders to rationalize this one.



Celtics Fight Each Other!

DATELINE: ‘Former Celtic’ is Always a Dirty Term


Two of our favorite Celtics characters were sent packing to other teams some time ago. However, that does not mean they are not still Celtics.

Case in point, Rajon Rondo and Isaiah Thomas. They bleed Green.

Both men were lively point guards, fun to watch and delightful off-beat souls. Rondo had a temperament that helped win a banner over seven years. Thomas never won a banner but played like a wounded warrior through dark days and dark events in his personal life.

This weekend was supposed to be a video tribute to Thomas’s few years in Boston, but it was not meant to be.

It was Paul Pierce’s retirement ceremony. His 34 went to the rafters, and it was not a moment to be shared. The video tribute to Isaiah Thomas (then of the Cavaliers) was postponed indefinitely.

Before it happened, Rondo said Isaiah didn’t deserve a tribute because he never won a championship. Rondo insisted he knew Boston better than Thomas. That might’ve meant an interesting game, watching Rondo sitting right near the Cavaliers bench waiting for a turn to honor Paul Pierce.

Oh yes, though he plays for the Chicago Bulls, Rondo returned to Boston for Pierce’s retirement. That in itself was marvelous. He joined his former coach Doc Rivers and his best friend Kevin Garnett. Once a Celtic, always the Celtic.

Abruptly traded to the Lakers, Isaiah Thomas faced Rondo within the week as opposing players Laker versus Bull.

If you were surprised by the next part, you never watched a Celtics game. The two former Celtics went at each other in the first quarter several times, nasty words and physical pushes nearly turning into a brawl.  They both were ejected from the game.

Thomas insisted that Rondo was giving him a hard time for the tribute video that never happened and likely accused him of being a fake Celtic.

A true Celtic comes back to the Boston TD Garden even when he plays for another team for a ceremony because he has never shed the Celtic Green inside.

We love our former Celtics. They are never former.


Strange Case of Aaron Hernandez

DATELINE: Dead Man’s Tales


Celebrity DNA

Flash!  Jose Baez, erstwhile lawyer for the late Aaron Hernandez, has found a way to recover his lost retainer:  like so many sycophants, he is writing a book that is allegedly going to shock everyone with its revelations about his client who it is now proven suffered from CTE, the concussion syndrome.

Baez (‘Don’t call me Joan”) plans for his tell-all to come out in August. So much for attorney-client privilege.

However, as readers of this blog know, we have been on top of the Hernandez case since 2013—and were the first to report early on about the sexual peccadilloes of Mr. Hernandez. We even had the shocking photos to prove it that shows what kind of weapon he was packing.

Our first in the nation expose of Hernandez is rightfully called The Strange Case of Aaron Hernandez and is comprised of all the on the spot blogs done, day by day, as the case unfolded.

In our shocker, you learn whether the Hernandez mansion is haunted, thereby negating any number of sales.

You will learn that Hernandez may have been involved with the in other murders in Florida where he attended college with his close friends, the Pouncey Twins, not to be confused with the Bobsey Twins.

We endeavored to find the stories behind the stories: how Hernandez killed flies and put them in his prison food to demand a second meal.

You will only hear the theories about why Hernandez had to stop 2 miles from his home in Attleboro at a deserted industrial park to take a bathroom break with one of the victims who never returned from his ablutions.

Only our book compares Hernandez to Lizzie Borden and wonders what Tom Brady knew and when did he know it.

And our book, however tasteless and unobjective, is available immediately on Amazon in both e-book and paper versions. It’s in the large book format for easy reading and heavy lugging.

Why wait till August when you can have your cake and murder it too right now?

Check it out here.







Will the Real Bill Belichick Please Stand UP?

DATELINE:  It’s Badenov, Oddjob!

 Boris Badenov Belichick Oddjob

First, it was Boris Badenov. Then, it was Oddjob. Now it’s even worse: Bill Belichick has gone blackhat.

Rats are now departing the sinking ship of S.S. Philly Eagles.

Not one mouse could deal with the image of the man who made fame in cut-off sweat shirts appearing like the pall-bearer for the underdogs of football.

The Eagle has not landed. It’s been grounded.

When Bill Belichick, of hoodie fame, donned a Fedora and black suit when he deplaned the Kraft One Jet, augurs went bonkers.

Magnetic north has shifted. Oddsmakers are scurrying for cover.

Not since the Corleone family flew into Vegas has there been such a fashion statement.

You know the villain always wears the black hat, but the film noir world just found its new Robert Mitchum—and he is the man holding all the cards and likely carrying a concealed weapon under his coat.

Frostbite Falls just went into heart seizure. The Super Bowl has just become the Super Bowler. Oddjob worked for Goldfinger and wore a Fedora with a steel-lined brim.

People are prepared to duck if Belichick throws his hat into the Super Bowl ring.

Frostbite Falls, Minnesota, has not seen a Fedora like this since Bullwinkle battled Boris Badenuv on the Rocky Show.









Radio ‘Personality’ Attacks Brady Child

DATELINE: Boston Radio Bites Brady’s Hand

 Dumb America Alex Reimer of WEEI

Half-baked and over-educated sports writer in Boston by the name of Alex Reimer has brought down the wrath of Brady.

Reimer is a fill-in host on WEEI radio, one of the lesser known sports radio stations. And in his capacity as a fill-in, he decided to attack Brady’s new TV show Tom Versus Time by calling Brady’s little daughter “an annoying pissant.”

You know this sports writer has an over-extended vocabulary for a weak-brained audience when he resorts to adding an adjective to pissant. Let alone verbally abusing a child. His career in Boston is now officially dead.

Most small children have not yet reached their full potential, unlike sports reporters. It seems a little unfair to attack a small girl for not reaching her life’s significant work. It is easier to attack a fake news journalist for reaching his lowly spot on radio.

As it is, Brady has been the station’s most important guest over the past 17 years. He shows up faithfully every Monday morning and then answers scatterbrained questions from a couple of nitwit radio hosts. This morning was different. He hung up after two minutes.

Brady let it be known that he had been treating everybody with respect, but an attack on his daughter was the last straw. Even if it is the first straw we know about.

All this goes to the concept that celebrities who put their children in the spotlight are likely to regret it. Warned not to use his children in this TV show, Brady went right ahead and put his son and daughter in the cross-hairs of dimwits.  It’s not fair to the dimwits, or Brady’s kids.

It’s also not fair for so-called journalists to review a TV series and attack the reality of children being children. We ourselves have made snide comment on Brady’s Time versus Tom show, but we have reserved our attacks to adult children like Alex Guerrero and Julian Edelman.

We think Tom has learned an important lesson here as he jets off to the Super Bowl: Always beware of feeding the media dogs.

As befits an annoying pissant, Reimer has been suspended indefinitely and recalled from Minnesota where he was covering the Patriots.


Brady’s Tell-All, Episode Two

DATELINE:  A Shakespearean Life of Tom

 tom & julie practice

Tom Brady’s autobiographical miniseries, Tom Versus Time, continues to hit the hot airwaves in the days before the Super Bowl.

The problem with tell-all documentaries that don’t tell much is that friends are not viewers. Viewers are enemies, and they are looking for chinks in the armor, blatant deceptions, errors of judgment, and sundry revelations of the unexpected.

In that way, Brady continues to deliver the goods in the second episode of his self-indulgent rumination.

This show is about his mental game. He is on the down-slide of chess, not checkers. He must process and adapt it to a declining physical body. Tom House, the ex-Red Sox pitcher, advises him on the beach with Alex Guerrero and Julie Edelman doing the hard work (the only one shirtless and shoeless), catching balls.

Tom watches all day tape and film two or three days per week.  His book sits neatly on his desk, in one product placement silliness. He can watch game tape five hours at a time. It’s an addiction. He’s an addict. He sees his losses as a Gong Show with layers of scar tissue. Like an elephant, he lumbers to the finish line.

Brady tells how he often wants to kill Josh McDaniels, and vice versa. That’s love.

Few names or faces are identified because the only one that matters is Tom who struts and frets about being a poor player upon the stage, waiting for tomorrow’s game after a loss.

Tom House ruminates about aging and dusty death, and Tom regards past Super Bowl failures as a walking shadow. In between his tale of sound and fury, he films a commercial for a luxury car with his son at his side at his palatial feudal estate.

This stuff cannot be made up.


Top Ten Stories of 2017 Patriot Season

 DATELINE: Countdown to Madness


We almost decided not to tell the story of the Patriots this year.

You may have not noticed, but since 2011, we have been putting out an annual, and sometimes twice-yearly book of collected observations, based on our hither and yon blog.

So, we thought we ought to skip this year: there would never be another Super Bowl run like the last one.

How lucky we stayed the course. How wrong we were.

If we had not done this year’s catalogue, we’d have missed ten big stories. Here they are, ascending or descending, it doesn’t matter.

  1. The Patriots bought not one, but two, 747 jets to travel in style around the world—as far away as Mexico and as near as Buffalo. The Two Jet Krafts rivaled the AirForce One of the President.
    1. Bad pennies kept coming back: stories about Aaron Hernandez, Martellus Bennett, and James Harrison, meant vampires lived in the Patriot mythology.


    1. Tom Brady declined to go to the White House in the mode of Trump’s best pal, and the snub was returned when Trump started golfing with Peyton Manning. Tom & Trump never spoke again.
  1. The continuing soap opera about Tom Brady’s stolen blouse, taken by a culprit in the fake news media who parlayed his access to the Pats locker room whilst Tom collected awards at the Super Bowl LI, became a memorabilia nightmare. A young fan from Seattle saved the day by fingering the crook and locating the lucky and unlucky stolen blouse.
  1. Tom’s incredible vanishing backups shocked the football world. Two highly prized young quarterbacks were in destiny’s path to replace Brady in the near or distant future. A funny thing happened on the way to the Super Bowl… Jimmy G and Jacoby B were gone with the wind.

  1. The Mirror Crack’d was once an Agatha Christie murder mystery, but Tom Brady usurped the idea when he deliberately smashed a mirror to prove there is no such thing as bad luck. Immediately, people around him started dropping like the Bubonic Plague hit Boston.

  1. There were many victims of the TB12 Method that looked like a strategy out of the Lady Macbeth/Bill Belichick playbook. However, it was not Giselle who had a Merlin-style magic hold on Brady. It was his masseur and business partner, godfather Alex Guerrero.

  1. Tom Brady never gives up when he is losing in the fourth quarter. From amazing Super Bowl comebacks to weekly games that fans gave up on: Tom came back and won them all, making it a risky business to shut off the Pats on TV in the third quarter if they are losing badly.

  1. Cold War within Patriots would have been the top story in any other year. Belichick, Kraft, and Brady were feuding and fighting, sick and tired of each other after 17 years of championships. Imagine how quickly they would have ended their business acumen & agreements if they lost all those seasons.

  1. *** We suspected it for a long time, but Tom’s complete Insanity came to the forefront, whether it was joining up with Tony Robbins, or pontificating like Rasputin on a 6-part TV series, smashing mirrors, or insisting he was a pleasant person (sort of like his pal Trump claiming he is a stable genius). This year Tom Brady proved he was a true nutcase and kookoo bird.


What a season. What a year.  And, the Super Bowl is still ahead.


Dubious Bart Scott at it Again

DATELINE: Tales from a Loser

former jet loser Big Head & Little Mind

When you find a hater of the Patriots, he will be unrelenting in trying to spew forth his venom.

That case in point can be found in scurrilous Bart Scott, sometime player and now occasional analyst and guest commentator on the game. You may recall CBS dumped him from their pre-game show for being negative and subjective.

This week he tried to dispel any positive feelings for the Patriots by linking them again to Aaron Hernandez, the dead player who murdered a bunch of people and got away with it. Now he is trying to tie murderer Aaron Hernandez to a team he had not played for in years.

Former Jet perennial loser, Scott shared his memories that Hernandez was often taunted on the field by other players for two murders in Florida that he was never charged with. Those murders occurred while Hernandez was a student at the University of Florida with the notorious, now reformed Pouncey Twins. As Scott’s friends, he omitted them from the story.

According to Scott, players would try to unnerve Hernandez by asking him where he buried the Florida bodies, long before the killings in the Boston area.

Scott was not done with his Super Bowl week story. He insisted that the worst part of Hernandez’s career was being signed by a New England team: legendary winning Patriots.

In Scott’s mind, there was nothing worse than playing for a hometown team because Hernandez was too close to his gang roots in Connecticut, which led to his murder sprees.

Why is this coming out when the Pats go to the Super Bowl for media week?  Scott is trying to create the notorious distraction that Bill Belichick always warns his player are out there.

In this case, they are out in the fevered mind of Bart Scott.









Time Versus Tom and Vice Versa

DATELINE:  Brady’s Life

movietone news   march of time news

The first 24-minute episode of the six-part series on and about Tom Brady revealed nothing and everything. It was the best of documentaries and the worst of documentaries. It’s called Tom Versus Time, and it is like watching the old chestnut March of Time in video newsreel format.

Tom Brady morphs into Charles Foster Kane.

No, Gotham Chopra is not Charles Dickens, and Tom is no David Copperfield. There is more of Dorian Gray here than gravy. The infomercial known as Brady’s life is like a bit of undigested beef. It just sits there.

If you want shock, Tom does not refer to Swami Belichick as “Coach,” his usual reverential term for 17 years. He calls him, heaven forfend, “Belichick,” and shares his notes from one of the Head Coach’s lectures. It is filled with laughable platitudes, and Tom keeps a wink in his hip pocket.

Brady also shows his four-game suspension letter, which he enjoys for its motivational impact. Tom follows in the carbon footprints of motivational charlatan Tony Robbins. They even did a vaudeville act together in Boston this year.

Tom allows quite an intimate picture of his children, which most celebrities avoid. It seems to follow his dictum that nothing matters but winning.

If episode one conveys any sense out of nonsense, it is that there is no straightforward narrative line here. We see clips from all over the year, piled on the previous with a little philosophical mortar to hold them together.

Gotham’s city of Brady may be a bit heavy on bats in the belfry. Director Gotham Chopra knows what idolization means. Off the field Tom Brady is clearly a koo-koo bird.

This is homage and paean to Tom, as directed by an adoring Boswell. You won’t find T.E. Lawrence’s Seven Pillars of Fire here, only six. It is, after all, an infomercial.

Of all Tom’s thousands of player-friends over two decades, only two knights show up at the Round Table: Julie Edelman and Danny Amendola. There is no Tom in team Gillette, but we do see Alex Guerrero, the Merlin of football wizards, giving Brady a solid massage in this medium well-done documentary.

The star quarterback is entitled to his fair share of egomania, considering his impressive  accomplishments. Walking on water will do that for Lawrence of Arabia and Tom Brady. The adoring masses tend to confirm his warrior status, though he has no plan here to sell himself short.

More to come, like a Batman cliffhanger.



Rajon Rondo Back with Fan Elan

DATELINE: Back Where He Belongs


We were giddy to see Rajon Rondo, even in an ugly Pelican uniform.

Now 31, but looking as young as ever, Rondo came back to Boston for one night and instantly put his stamp of controversy on the Celtics.

He told media members that former Celt Isaiah Thomas did not deserve a video tribute. After all, as Rondo pointed out, he was only on the team for three years and never won a championship. It’s those banners up above the parquet floor that matter.

When Rondo said, “This is the Boston Celtics,” to shoot down the notion that IT deserved not much more than nothing. You know that Rondo is still a Celtic to the core, no red uniform could hide that fact.

Rondo knows of what he speaks. He spent nine years in Boston, and the most recent championship banner came from his hard efforts with the most recent Big Three who are Hall of Fame bound.

You know Rondo loves Paul Pierce—and to honor the latest Cleveland Cavalier with a video would take away from Pierce’s truly great Celtic achievements.

Indeed, Pierce himself sent out word that he thought offering a video tribute to Cousin IT was done out of guilt for trading him so coldly.

If memory serves us, the Celtics also traded Pierce and Rondo for business and humanity.

Then, Rondo in his inimitable fashion went out on the floor and showed he still had that amazing passing ability, doling out assists. Some people might be infatuated with Anthony Uni-brow, wanting him in Boston, but for us, it was Rondo who was the marvel.

We miss Rondo still. We think he misses Boston.


Wry Catcher: Why J.D. Salinger?

DATELINE:   Movie Bio

REAL SALINGER Angry Salinger Wants to be Alone

Director Danny Strong joins a list of people who are violating every standard that J.D. Salinger lived by. He hated publicity and adoration of koo-koo bird fans.

You could say the new movie of Salinger’s life Rebel in the Rye is nothing short of a misnomer, however well-intended and well-done.

We are always impressed with Nicholas Hoult, who again here, gives us an American New Yorker accent and a man who lost his mind in World War II after seeing horror up close. The British actor has turned into a new nationality in his movie roles, and adds brown contact lenses to cover up those startling blue eyes that he is famous for. It is another superior performance in a growing litany of interesting films.

The movie has one big problem: Kevin Spacey. He plays the mentor and admirer of Salinger, editor and discoverer Whit Burnett, who seems almost to have a fetish when it comes to his prize pupil. Alas, Spacey’s personal history almost circumvents the movie and makes us think he was groping Nick Hoult between scenes, or that Burnett was groping Salinger. Yikes.

The producers have left Spacey’s name off the publicity because it’s such a turnoff. Not everyone has Ridley Scott’s money to simply replace Spacey with computer effects.

It’s a shame because Spacey’s presence does distract, though his performance is brilliant—and the movie proceeds on its mission to present us with a writer who loved to write, but hated his readers.

Salinger was no genius, but he had his finger on the pulse of Zen Buddhist seclusion. The attempt to turn him into his own character, Holden Caulfield, seems a bit forced. Boswell was not Sam Johnson, though he wrote about him.

The film is worth it for fans of Salinger, even if they are not wearing red hunting caps and stalking writers who hide out in New Hampshire.


Patriots Big Three @ Yalta Foxboro

DATELINE:  Patriots War

big three of Foxboro photo of Kraft, Brady, & Belichick

History remembers the Big Three at Yalta and Pottsdam, but the latest Big Three just issued a joint communique from Foxboro. Humorists never had it this good.

If you know how the first peace talks turned out back in ’45, you know that one last Super Bowl may be in the offing.

After that, all bets are off.

If Belichick is Stalin, and Kraft is Churchill, that makes Tom Brady the Truman of the bunch. That’s about as close to Trump as you can get.

Word is out that the statement issued of their solidarity and togetherness is about as phony as anyone who said the court of Henry VIII was a walk in the park.

Tom Brady was so jealous of young and virile Jimmy G that he lobbied to have him sent in exile to San Francisco over the near dead body of Coach Belichick.

Brady had Jimmy G locked out of the Alex Guerrero TB12 training center at one point. Talk about petty.

There are claims that the old man of the team was furious that he did not receive Belichick’s weekly awards for good play. What’s worse, Blight Belichick apparently let it be known that Tom was starting to age more than the portrait stashed in his attic.

If you think you would only see this kind of intrigue in Trump’s looney White House, you now understand what trickle down means.

You better stroke the ego of that guy at the top, whether it’s in Washington or Foxboro.



The Great Tom Brady Fault

DATELINE:  Movers and Earth Shakers

 scream up close Patriot Fans Silent Scream

Scientists in New England have discovered an earthquake fault line in Foxboro. It runs right through New England Patriot country.

Resembling the notorious rift called the San Andreas Fault in California, the New England version centers around cracks in the great football empire of the Kraft family.

The Pats sent Jimmy G off to San Fran where Tom Brady’s heart was born, and the tremors are now starting in New England.

It seems the possible damage might include the Pats sliding into the Atlantic Ocean if the eruption and shaking continues. It seems the fault line can be traced to Tom Brady’s guru/nutcase inventor of the TB12 Method. No one is closer to Tom, not even Hurricane Jules.

Alex Guerrero has been banned from the sidelines and from travel on the JetKraft team airplane with Tom by the Thunderous Bill Belichick. The GOAT admits that there is a fault line developing.  It could shake the entire area if Tom is sent sliding into the NFL when the rift with Belichick is exposed.

Right now it is merely a crackpot line in the sand. Plate techtonics indicate that Brady is standing on the line and jumping up and down on it.

Tom’s Fault now has claimed other Patriots who have sought refuge with the Guerrero Camp over Patriot doctors’ advice. Gronk, Edelman, and even Hanley Ramirez of the Red Sox, are now planning for the Big One to shake up sports.

We are not sure if the faultline ought be called the Brady Rift, the San Belichick Fault, or name the entire potential disaster after the notorious snake oil salesman, Alex Guerrero.

We know only that the tremors have sent Patriot fans scurrying about. How can a potential tsunami like this be at the Patriot doorstep?

The Great Tom Brady Earthquake is now on top of the New England Patriot worry list.


Hunting for Zodiac Killer: History (s1) for Openers

DATELINE: Armchair Detectives

 zodiac killer Purported Zodiac Killer

Whether you’re hunting for Hitler or cursing Oak Island, you know you must have clicked onto the streaming History channel.

Their first season of Hunt for the Zodiac Killer delivers exactly what you come to expect from the cable TV’s pop history purveyors. That’s not necessarily a bad thing if you like your reality stars always self-congratulating each other for their brilliant detective skills.

If The Hunt for the Zodiac Killer sounds like one of those fake news documentaries, you probably would be right. Yet, it is a cold case and being insoluable should not mean it is not ripe for re-examination.

Fifty years after the legendary1960s serial murderer unofficially killed 37 innocent people and left a calling card of cryptological taunts with a unbreakable code, the network has assembled a reality show with a formula that can’t miss entertaining fans of psycho monsters running amok.

These researchers give Zodiac his due—and find even more victims to offer History Channel and history buffs.

When you put two retired homicide detectives in the field doing legwork like Sam spade and Philip Marlowe, then match them with a couple of cryptographical scientists and nerds with computers, you stir deliberately.

You have suddenly a fascinating show.

The gum shoes and the nerds play ping-pong with the clues. We keep telling ourselves that a supercomputer that has been programmed to think and act like a serial killer is not a good idea.

We keep wondering when the computer will turn into the Forbin Project supercomputer  or HAL from 2001. Then again, the Zodiac maniac seems even brighter than Carmel, the computerized serial killer finder.

Before you know it, you may be hooked on the revelations. Several police departments refused to cooperate, at their own peril. They look like impediments to the crime solving.

By turning the zodiac killer into a mad genius, the show has a winning formula – and a frightening one.



To Goggle or Not to Goggle, Jaylen Brown!

DATELINE:  Jaylen’s Wear Daily Reports

 clark kent

Jaylen Brown’s eyes don’t have it. Goggles don’t make his brown eyes blue. Goggles have given him a headache and a black eye in the fashion world.

Brown’s fashionplate goggles have bitten the dust in Jaylen’s locker. We are back to contact lenses, limited to two to three hours per day. Jaylen has decided those hours are game time.

Apparently the intellectual look is not the best way to see eye to eye with the basketball. The Brown Green Lantern has tried three options now, and finds he prefers contact lenses, no matter how encrusted his eyelids may become after inflammation.

We first recommended cleaning the lenses regularly, or perhaps wearing a new, fresh pair of eyeballs. That can only occur after the infection heals.

Jaylen, a 21 year old smarty pants, is worried about the windows to his soul. If you look at those those big brown panes, you may see a young man in pains.

At first he claimed the goggles were constrictive, or perhaps he simply was intolerant about giving them a chance. Then he had a second pair made, that were too tight around his egghead. Loose straps mean more traps.

He ripped off the goggles and played with bad eyesight for most of his worst game of the season. It seems he could not see much—his vision being a big blur without corrective lenses.

Yes, we recommend playing with corrected vision, Jaylen. He barely could see the hoop the other day when he threw out all lens assistance.

Old habits die hard, and contact lenses are here to stay. If Jaylen cannot accept goggles, we won’t judge him too harshly. Even the Celtics Yoda, Tommy Heinsohn, said that Jaylen Brown played better without goggles.

The Green Lantern of Brown has bats in his belfry and a pointed noggin when it comes to the notions counter of goggles-to-wear. He has batted his big beautiful eyes once too often.

Fashion and taste are all important in basketball, if you ask the young man who likes to wear short shorts against the grain of fellow players.  Jaylen has so far resisted the urge to ask the advice of Jayson Tatum, his nemesis.