Captain Tom Brady, Avast!

Adrift with the Grift

DATELINE: Drifting with Grifting

When we reported earlier this week that grifter Tom Brady used his friendship with Grifter-Elect Donald Trump to procure a one million dollar loan from the economic crisis fund, no one cared much. Business as usual among thieves.

Up periscope!

Brady actually had the temerity to apply for a government grant of one million dollars for his “small business.” This revelation was just released by the Small Business Administration, as the Trump crooks are heading for the exits.

Yes, believe it or don’t, Tom Brady needed a loan to help his company TB12,

Now we learn that landlubber Brady aspires to be among the captains of sea lore:  Captain Queeg, Captain Wolf Larson, Captain Kidd, Captain Bligh, and now Captain Brady.

He bought a $multi-million 40 ft. yacht with his spoils and loan from the government. Apparently sales on his copper-infused pajama bottoms were dragging and baggy in the crotch. To cheer himself up, the newly fangled Buccaneer Pirate has gone shipshape with a yacht.

Yes, now Brady can make Julian Edelman walk the plank and cast his fate to the wind. Gronk can now party until he’smal de merry. Tom won’t be swimming with the fishes, but he will be looking out for Flipper. It won’t be Superman up in the crow’s nest. It will be a bird of another feather: the crooked yellow-bellied sapsucker Buc.

Maybe we’ll get lucky and he’ll strike an iceberg on his maiden voyage.