Oak Island Ends 7th Season with $ Whimper

DATELINE: The Price is not Right.

 Star is born.

When Gary Drayton is doing the History Channel promos for the last episode of the season, you know they have a new star on their hands.

It’s raw November as the season ends, and the digging time is over. The so-called Fellowship’s final dig becomes too dangerous and is curtailed because of collapsing tunnels. It is the worst news of the season.

Attention immediately shifted to the swamp. It was a docking area and a man-made site, and Dr. Ian Spooner brings the most interesting news. He dated tree branches and rushed to give them the dates of his findings.

The swamp was created in 1200 A.D. which seems to be Templar. It is a stunning historical event, though this is secondary to finding gold in most eyes.

Marty Lagina resisted any idea of the swamp being important, but now he has found that answers are there. If the swamp was made in 1200, you have something momentous, far earlier than the Columbus discovering America notion.

Human activity could include tunneling 800 years ago. There is a stronger sense that there were several treasure burials. A second group may have taken advantage of their knowledge about the early excavations.

If there is cold water, Marty Lagina has the right to throw it on this exploration. He now states that additional digging for the Money Pit may now tally into the tens of millions. At what point does the treasure wash out by the cost of retrieving it?

Should they dig down 250 feet and create a concrete circle in which you may find the treasure?  It seems beyond feasible. How much profit can you dig out of this series?

A memorial to honor Dan Blankenship was created immediately, no matter what else happens. Dan’s not able to be there, but his presence will remain.

 

Shatner & Shakespeare on Oak Island

DATELINE: Shatner Returns to Treasure Hunt

 Cold Day in November!

We know how much everyone enjoyed William Shatner on Oak Island, but he must have also enjoyed it because he has come back for the final night of season 7.

His theory is worthy of the UnXplained,and we fully concur with him.

There is a fairly sharp start that indicates that Shakespeare may have been borderline literate: his father and mother were illiterate and only middle-class. His own education was fair, not royal and not comprehensive.

So, Shatner takes some relish in debunking the Bard and suggesting the real writer was a man with credentials, like Sir Francis Bacon, member of the Elizabethan court. There may even be several authors, as Shatner hints.

Cyphers in the original folio have intrigued researchers that there is something that matches Nolan’s Cross on Oak Island. In fact, Bacon was connected to Knights Templar through Rosiecrucians—and he may have known of the secret vaults on Oak Island—and chose to bury his Shakespeare originals there.

One can find that The Tempest may be confessional in terms of Bacon burying “my booke.”  If overlaid on the final page of The Tempest, you find a spot that would correspond to the Eye of the Swamp on the Island.

We were amused when Rick Lagina called Bacon the Michelangelo of his day: if history is correct, they were almost contemporaries as Michelangelo’s death crossed the date of Bacon’s birth. Technically, he was right.

Parchment was found over 160 feet below the earth. Bookbinding material was found near the Money Pit deep down.

Even the Laginas seemed intrigued that Shakespeare’s first folio is there.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

  Westworld 3 Turns into Person of Interest

DATELINE: Persons of Westworld Interest

  Enrico Colatoni Returns.

It seems almost logical that creator Jonathan Nolan, mastermind of the Grand Computer of Person of Interest (not Finch), has also created the same AI for Westworld.

Now with the grand finale on the horizon for season three, we find ourselves in a strangely familiar place. There, locked away in a giant warehouse, is the computer from Person of Interest. As if to confirm this, the second banana from that earlier series, Enrico Colatoni, shows up here as a guest star in essentially the same role.

We are also given several intriguing finale confrontations: it now seems that William (Ed Harris) will save the world by destroying the creation of AI from Person of Interest. There is also the big bash between Maeva and Dolores (Newton and Wood). Their fight scenes are, of course, reminiscent of death fights with men in generations past of movies.

Now with a series of women directors and creative powers on Westworld III, we are seeing the past come alive with women in the same roles.

If you expect Jim Cavaiezel to make a guest appearance, it might not happen for another season. After all, this week HBO announced that Westworld will be renewed and will finish out six seasons.

We were most amused to find the AI of the earlier series still prisoner and now obsolete, trying still to save people as it did in the earlier show with Finch and Reese.

We presume that to continue for three more seasons the entire cast must find themselves back in their familiar roles at Westworld as the TV series roots three seasons ago. Whatever the robot revolution was meant to be, it is hardly about to come to an end.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Shatner Goes to Dogs

DATELINE: Amazing Animals on UnXplained  

 Statue of Greyfriars Bobby!

 

“Amazing animals”, indeed, as UnXplained  takes on the mysteries of animal sentience. It is not just cats and dogs that Shatner gives a full nod and wink, but birds and whales too.

In certainly one of the most intriguing episodes of the series, the vignettes under study include one on the famous and heroic horse from the Korean War! Yes, a horse with independent spirit worked near miracles without human assistance. Sergeant Reckless even has a statue to her testimony—and how did she know what to do to bring wounded soldiers to medical assistance. Who knew there was an active military horse as late as the 1950s?

Shatner admits that his own love of horses is proven by the ability of the creatures to bond with its riders. Such animals are often used for therapy with psychically injured vets who need TLC—which the horse can provide.

There is also a rather interesting take on the Disney movie that was, in fact, a true story about Greyfriars Bobby. That’s the dog with such loyalty that for 14 years he slept every night on his master’s grave.

The suggestion here is that these animals saw dead people, or had psi trailing ability. That’s the condition where cats can go over a 1000 miles to locate a family they belong to.

There are also stories about dolphins and whales saving people from predators tiger sharks, as well as warblers that seem to take cues from Nature about meteorology and dangers.

If you think that the animal kingdom is more psychic than you ever suspected, this is your evidentiary show. Fascinating, with the usual Shatner delivery to amuse us.

Trump’s Quarantini

 DATELINE: Add Lysol & Chlorox.

 Scoll!

When Jim Jones wanted to kill off his supporters, he offered them Kool-Aid as a quick remedy. When Heaven’s Gate wanted to eliminate its members, they donned purple sheets and drank an elixir to send them to the asteroid belt.

Trump wants to give his followers a Chlorox Chaser and a wine cooler to end their days with the bad economy and coronavirus.

Turn on the gamma rays and bottoms up. There’s nothing like a refreshing blast of Lime Lysol and Soda right before your stimulus check bounces.

If you think Trump was being sarcastic, you have to realize that the bad joke is 50,000 dead Americans while Trump fiddles away in the White House. Nero had nothing on Trump

Pass the Tequila and drop in one of those laundry detergent pellets for just the right bounce in your dryer days.

Putin recommends a Black Russian made with two parts liquid Comet Cleanser. It takes the edge of sweetness off your last coughing breath.

We think the last days of mud in your eye ought to be spent with a drink the boys in the back room shared with Marlene: whiskey on the rocks of Tide.

Time and Tide wait for no president who sticks a UV ray gun up his country’s kazoo.

Bottoms up, Trump supporters. Eat dishwasher pellets, drink Lysol, and be merry for tomorrow your President will close the Post Office and send you the bill for his insanity treatment by Pony Express.

 

 

 

 

  Westworld 3.6, Serac, See Rac Run

DATELINE: Breaking with Pinky 

 Williams 1 & 2

We doubt the series can recover its equilibrium now that it is on a path where everyone is a host and no one is a guest. Robots, Robots, everywhere, and not a human to be entertained.

Jonathan Nolan’s Futureworld took a couple of steps deeper into the abyss of bleakness, and it ain’t pretty, no matter how clean the future streets are looking. That in itself is a tip-off that what’s real may not be what you see.

This episode is called “Decoherence,” which apparently indicates the series is now a step away from incoherence.

If there is redemption in this episode, it can be found in the group therapy session of William (Ed Harris). Now committed to a mental institution, his hallucinogenic therapy includes a hilarious session with all aspects of his past self: boy, young man, man in black, business tycoon, and mental patient.

This allows Jimmi Simpson to return for one bravura recap as his character of William. It leads to cynical villain William realizing he is indeed the hero of his own life.

As far as Ed Harris is concerned, he is not happy with the role and its turn of events. He signed on to play the Man in Black—and he may bail on the series if it continues. He was so unhappy that he broke Jimmi Simpson’s finger in their big fight scene.

The other major development that may turn into an interesting plot maneuver is the alteration of Tessa Thompson’s Charlotte who had begun to identify with the human side more than ever. Once crossed, and crossing that threshold, she may become a woman scorned: truly more dangerous than Maeve.

What may be converging here is a means to save Westworld from sure destruction on several sides. What it ultimately changes into could set us up for another season, or a neat ending to the proceedings.

Jim Jordan: Man without Country Pants

DATELINE: Sieg Heil!

 Man in White!

If you like your political theories salacious and unpleasant, please read on:

We have learned that Ohio’s Rep. Jim Jordan, defender of Trump to the death (and he’s not even from New Hampshire where “Live Free or Die,” are the new coronavirus watchwords.

You may recall Here Comes Mr. Jordan,a dead man walking movie, and you may recall Jim Jordan, a dead man defending Trump on impeachment. Racists deny their racism may be his motto.

During that high time, Jordan refused to wear a suitcoat. He wanted to flaunt protocol and fashion shense. It made him look like a white-shirted KKK agent in Congress. He lacked on the hood. He is no knight in shining armor, but more like a night rider.

Now we hear that he is refusing to wear a protective mask in Congress. Since he is always a danger to infect other people with whatever virus he carries, this is blatant disregard for humanity. His disrespect knows only the bounds of genocide. He would kill you in a heartbeat if you are a Democrat, an oldster, a black person, or of any color he despises.

Now we hear speculation that he refuses to wear undies. Yes, beneath the surface is a naked ugly truth about Jim Jordan. He has no panties, women’s or otherwise.

Should we be alarmed that the emperor has no clothes or underclothes? It’s to be expected when you wear white robes and matching hood every night.

Tom Brady: Knock on Any Door

DATELINE: Knock Three Times and Use the Secret Password.

 Ring a Ding Ding?

There was a famous Hollywood crime movie starring Humphrey Bogart called, Knock on any Door. It seems to have suddenly become the mantra of Tom Brady. In the immortal words of Maynard G. Krebs, “You rang?”

The former New England Patriot packed up his kit bag and headed to Tampa Bay or Tompa Bay, and he is the big man on Tompas.

However, he is still metaphorically and literally a man asea. He went to visit a coach and simply opened the door to a home and entered. You guessed it! It was the wrong address and the wrong party line.

In most states this is called B&E, breaking and entering. And, in conjunction with being cited for breaking the law at a Tampa Bay Park a day earlier, Brady is now on a footing to have a mug shot posted before his NFL profile pix on Tampa Bay Bucs website.

Maybe he was looking for his receiver Gronk who is also moving to Florida soon—and who knows? He may end up renting a room from the only man he ever wanted to catch passes from.

Stranger things have happened and may yet happen. We are waiting for the other shoe to fall: when will Julian Edelman, already upset at being left out of the social distance, may demand a trade to Tampa to join Alex Guerrero, fitness guru, and Brady advisor, in the pirate ship before it sinks.

If it seems Patriots have abandoned ship in commemoration of the RMS Foxboro Belichick ship sinking, you could say the lifeboats are filling up quickly.

The iceberg is Belichick himself—and when you hit him, you are doomed.

If the postman can ring twice, it seems Tom Brady should be able to stay at Mar-a-Lago without a bell or whistle blown. If you have friends in high places, you can violate pandemic protocol and walk into any home without being a home wrecker.

Tom Brady is off to a flying start in Florida where the beaches are now teeming with teammates and coronavirus pals.

 

 

Genre, the Drug-Addled Westworld 3.5

DATELINE: Our Least Favorite Episode in 3 Seasons! 

 Aaron Paul & Evan Rachel Wood.

The show Westworld  is now literally out of its world, out of its mind, and officially should have a new title. Going back decades, we loved the original Yul Brynner movie and even the not so good Peter Fonda sequel. We loved Jonathan Nolan’s first two clever and sharp seasons. We loved his Person of Interest.

Something has gone awry. This week’s episode was chaotic junk, with high speed car chases and drug-addled characters killing each other. We were not impressed to find Mr. Nolan slumming his Westworld to a dismal futuristic, misanthropic world where AI will eliminate real humans.

Apart from all else, it was so distasteful. And, the cast was so limited that we missed so many of the great characters who showed up for cameos a few weeks ago. Perhaps Nolan plans to have a grand finale in which all appear like in those Faulkner novels where all his favorite characters show up for a final bow.

It does seem to be the end of this series. Maybe Nolan and his partner Lisa Joy have run out of interest and ideas. We hope another project will return to the roots that Jim Cavaziel gave us in Person of Interest. There is no person of interest in this new season.

This new leading man, Aaron Paul, is an intense actor playing a rather dull character. No, there is no love interest with Dolores who is all business, and her job is chair of Murder, Inc.

There are three more episodes, came one reminder. Whether we shall be able to stomach any or all of them only the weeks ahead shall prove. We are most disappointed, having anticipated this show for a year.

 

What? Another Week of Season Seven?

DATELINE: Deadend Kids?

 Ball’s Tunnel?

It’s like lingering on a deathbed. Yet, here we are with another weekly survival on Curse of Oak Island. We are hanging on by a dendro count by our fingernails. Even Alex Lagina is starting to look shopworn, even with his filthy millions and clean hands.

Mother of Mercy, is there no one who will rid us of this meddlesome priest? Oh, wait, that’s another series altogether. If this continues, we think Gary Drayton will begin seeing the ghost of Hamlet’s father on the ramparts.

He does find a crowbar in what seems to be the true Money Pit. Legge thinks it is an anchor or pulley. He always impresses Alex. Gary realizes he needs a bigger metal detector.

Every time Carmen Legge says “1700” we begin to think it is a glitch on the audio. So, he shocks them by saying, “Middle Ages.”

At 120 feet below, there is again more coconut fiber. They also locate a metal shield that was used in 1931—not exactly the original diggers. But it does indicate that they have reached the end of searcher efforts.

Next should be original buried stuff. However, at this point, the crane pressure brace has broken. It’s a setback as the season comes to a finish. It does mean something is there causing the grinder to be blocked. But they are so desperate they are working into thedarkness.

This forces them to turn to excavating the home of a man who was once a slave but ended up super-wealthy. Samuel Ball had something tunneling under his house. Samuel Ball’s lot may have been over a much older vault. Something big may be apparent because Alex shows up and a camera is snaked deep into the tunnel.

TB 12 is Cited, not Sighted!

DATELINE: What Coronavirus? 

What, me worry?

If you are to believe the spinmeisters, Tom Brady (Tampa Brady 12) was cited for a misdemeanor for using a city park during the coronavirus pandemic.

Tampa Bay hardly wants to besmirch its newly arrived superstar—and whatever legal or police action was hastily buried, burned, covered up, and called a misunderstanding.

It now seems semantics over TB (Tom Bay 12) is at the crux of the problem. It seems the mayor of Tampa Bay is backtracking her officials: it seems she merely meant Tom had been sighted, not cited.

A Tom Brady sighting is one thing, and a Tom citation is quite another.

We know well that Tom Brady never practices alone in a park: he has a well-selected entourage, befitting a superstar, to catch his passes and pass his jokes on.

To say TB 12 was a man alone in the park is disingenuous, but fans are likely to agree with TB that the coronavirus is a tempest in a teapot, much ado about nothing.

As a Republican now in a Republican state, Tom never has to say he’s sorry for throwing social distance for a incomplete pass.

The idea that Tom may actually disaparage the deadly pandemic is well-within his new found freedom to live in Trump’s newly chosen home state.

You may well ask why Tom must chose a public venue for his practice when he can afford any private gym for whatever cost is charged. It’s the principle. He can do and will do whatever his Tom Foolery allows.

If you think Tom was sighted, you may well consider yourself “short-sighted” because like his former Patriots owner and surrogate father, Robert Kraft, cited in Florida is usually reserved for being caught with one’s pants down in a public area.

Tampa Bay has now discovered TB has a whole new public relations freedom—and city officials are scrambling to adjust to the new reality: pandemics be damned.

TB is now better protected by his line of baloney, from his line of baloney. For his line of baloney.

Westworld’s Version/Vision of Hell

DATELINE: Robby the Robot Need Not Apply!

 Ed Harris Looks for a Cut Throat.

Number Four of Westworld III  is a lulu. Perhaps the highpoint of the night is a fight between Evan Rachel Wood and muscleman Luke Hemsworth. It seems in our new age, a good fight among equals includes some give and take between the sexes as a little later Thandie Newton enjoys a good roust.

As for the series, in its mercurial way, remains cryptic beyond even its usual standards. In the fourth episode, we finally see the ravaged leftovers of Ed Harris, or William, who had been obsessed with Dolores from the start. Whether he is done for, or will come back, only four episodes left will tell.

Now, he is being played by other parties, haunted by the ghost of his dead daughter (or is she another robotic version sent to drive him all the way to the mental hospital?)

It seems a little early for everyone to receive his come-uppance, and whatever secrets Dolores is harboring, using all who enter her realm, there are several spearhead opponents—Maeve, Bernard, and possibly William. You can never count anyone out in this show where apparent death to robots means you’ll be back next week.

We are now so far afield from the original setting that it is hard to know where this vapid, wealthy future shall lead. We are not sure the series has anywhere else to go as we rush head-long into a robot apocalypse.

Jonathan Nolan has surprised us before, but he may well have overreached his play with this season of his intellectual treatise on the meaning of life and AI.

 

  Gorky Park: No Parking

DATELINE: Cold War Murder Mystery.

 Sable Hat Man!

Back in 1983 came the crime thriller about the Moscow Police Department (who had the unfortunate privilege of working under the KGB). It’s a definite low-tech crime CSI story about the cold-blooded Cold War killing of three people in Gorky Park.

Martin Cruz Smith’s novel was a best-seller, but based on this movie, the story is grisly and pathetic. Three bodies are found with their faces and fingers cut off to prevent identification. It seems a bit much for a small-time crime. Top-notch Soviet policeman William Hurt must solve the case.

There are some interesting moments in the film, but it pales next to today’s sharp TV crime dramas. Here in this film, it’s the cast that holds you in place, however miscast William Hurt is.

We were surprised to see great actor Alexander Knox (who played Woodrow Wilson once) in a small role as a Soviet general. But it is Americans like star Lee Marvin who steals every scene he is in: with second billing no less. He plays one of those American billionaires playing footsie with the Russians, and he is marvelous. He has cornered the market on Russian sables.

The late Brian Dennehy is also in the film in a small role, but with top billing as a New York cop doing an investigation off-duty in Moscow. He too is wonderful to behold.

As for the drudgery of Moscow with its 1970s cheap cars and unpleasant milieu, it’s all part of the flavor you can’t find anywhere else. But this is not Agatha Christie in the Kremlin, not even close.

Though some called the movie boring, its Moscow setting is dreary and mostly downbeat and dim-witted.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Skinwalker Waste of Time

DATELINE: Limited Series 

 Tom Winterbound.

Bless us and save us from those who are a day late and a dollar short. That’s saying some when you happen to be the billionaire owner of the Skinwalker Ranch.

What a dummy with an attitude.

With one of his young roustabouts hospitalized, Brandon Fugal was on the phone, ready to hop right over to the Utah site. However, it took him two days to arrive in his private fancy helicopter. Before he lands, young Tom Winterton is back from the hospital and ready to rejoin the team, health be damned.

When Fugal arrives, he has a metal case and has brought six Apple watches, or something akin, that will alert the wearers that they are under radioactive stress, or have a headache. He hands them out and is off again in his copter. He did not bother to bring watches for the ordinary workers, security guards, or even the production team for the TV show. Oh, well, it’s sort of like having coronavirus.

Next comes in a Terminator lookalike with dark glasses and a bad ass attitude with his fancy drones to look over the property and do ground radar penetration. He is so devoid of human feelings that we were tempted to suspect he was an alien skin-walker. However, when his fancy equipment had no battery connections because of the ranch overload, we had to laugh.

This show has now rendered Dr. Travis Taylor speechless and unimportant. That is not an easy task to perform. This series will be over before it can sink its hooks into you—and if History Channel has any brains, they will tell this show to shape up, or shift out.

 

 

 

 

 

Eero Saarinen: More than a Crossword Name

 DATELINE:  Gateway to Modern Architecture

   Eero-port Terminal.

 American Masters did a one-hour biography of the notable architect whose name dominates New York Timescrossword puzzles. Of course, he is one of the most modern of all kinds of American architects (by way of Finland as a boy).

Saarinen is best known as the man who designed the St. Louis Gateway Arch, iconic like the Pyramid of Giza. He wanted something to last 1000 years—and his arch may well reach that grandeur.

This documentary is mostly narrated by his son Eric who is a noted film cinematographer—not following in his father and grandfather’s footsteps. He was alienated from his pater, but this film (he confesses) has changed him by seeing what marvels his father created: from a John Deere office building to Kresge Auditorium at MIT, or even a hockey rink at Yale.

His aides told him all hockey rinks were barns, so he designed one at Yale that is staggering in its Norse winter sports notions.

His father was hard to eclipse. Eero grew up with his father’s friends Gustav Mahler and Sibelius hanging around the house. He was bounced on Frank Lloyd Wright’s knee. Heavens, he was destined to create great buildings.

He made only one house—a glass marvel with stunning modern light. He is airier and brighter than Wright.

Yet, we must admit that these creative geniuses are not particularly good at being a family man. Eero was not an exception, but his second wife got him on the cover of Time—and the rest is history.

Shatner’s UnXplained recently claimed his great Arch is meant as a weather control system to deflect thunder and lightning. No such grandiose claims are made here—only breathtaking buildings and grounds, not to mention furniture.

He worked 60 years ago, but looks more modern than anything done today. This film also collects the withering criticism he took over his designs—by those who felt he pandered to 1950s American commerce. How wrong can they be?

We once heard an architectural critique as “nobody wants to live in someone else’s head.” Alas, most heads are devoid of creativity, individuality, or good taste. Thank heavens for Saarinen.