DATELINE: No Smocking Zone
There’s a smocking gun in Donald Trump’s pocket. And he’s glad to give Season’s Greetings to Stormy Daniels if she has $300,000 for him.
The National Enquirer apparently knows that “peanut stuff” can be elephantine for the fat cat president who happens to be the biggest bath tub filler since William Howard Big-Boy Taft was in the White House.
The writing is on the wall and the walls are closing in, which certainly describes a penthouse for Putin at Trump Tower.
Trump only has a vague recollection of doing business “somewhere in Russia.” We suspect he was thinking of building gulags out in Siberia for his Fox and Friends.
We have come to realize that Mr. Trump does not know what the word “collusion” really means, which is not surprising for a self-styled genius with learning disabilities.
Next thing you know Trump will insist that payments to Stormy and friends were not champagne contributions. We’ll drink to that.
If you want to work in the White House, you have to be in line for Tom Sawyer’s whitewash fence job, according to an unimpeachable source named Tom Steyer.
Where there’s smock, for Trump, there may be a muumuu for prison garb. If the muumuu fits, it’s smocking hot.
If you want to work at the White House, you need an NDA, especially if you don’t have a big bank account on hold.
Hitler had his Big Lie, but Trump has a Bigger Denial.
The witch hunt Trump most enjoyed was when Samantha went looking her mother Endora on Bewitched.
Don, Jr., has gone missing this week. Reports have surfaced that he is Big Game Hunting for reindeer at the North Pole.
When you consider a $50million bribe to Putin to be “peanut stuff,” you have a Colossus of crime on your hands.
Napoleon was sent into political exile on a remote island for his crimes, but Trump will be sent to Gilligan’s Island for his antics.