Way Down Upon the Swami Belichick River

 DATELINE:  Inscrutable Bill


Belichick Mentor (in sweatshirt)

 Once again during a bye week, Patriots fans have taken umbrage with our terms of endearment.

Apparently it is just short of sacrilege to call Bill Belichick by the Hindu term “swami.”

Some people (of less than sharp mental acuity) have confused swami with Swanee. No, we are not comparing Bill Belichick to a Stephen Foster melody.  He is not like a pretty girl.

Those who live in the Boston area and drive over the Mystic River Bridge likely have a better grasp on the term “Swami Bill.”

And, no, it has nothing to do with receiving a bill for your tolls over the Mystic River.

To clarify, we might compare Swami Bill to Yogi Berra—or Yogi Bear.

They seem to be cut from the same sari cloth worn by fashion-plates like Harry Krishna.

For all you Dharma Bums, Bill Belichick seems to be holding on to some kind of satori, having epiphanies when it comes to player personnel. We have not yet put Bill Belichick into the marharishi category. We haven’t seen any pilgrimages by Lord Paul McCartney to the Foxboro mountain top. No, Bon Jovi doesn’t count.

We do know that the High Lama is named Brady, and the code word for Gillette is Shangri-La.

We are not even sure that Belichick has emulated Kerouac and written the road play book on a continuous roll of toilet paper. You wouldn’t understand it anyhow.

If you don’t know what’s going on with the Patriots, you are no Swami Bill.