Last Call for the Patriots Before the Bar Closes

DATELINE:  Flipper’s Flop

Imagine your NFL team in utter disarray and fearing for the future!  Yes, with the Patriots at Miami, you might start having trepidations. The New England varsity squad went to play the Dolphins—and left Julian Edelman to clean up the hockey rink at Gillette.

Tom Brady promised to wear Tuuka Rask’s image on his pads after Rask wore Brady’s image on his face mask. Tom may wish he could take his words back now. Talk about cursing your own fate.

Rask was sacked five times in his game—that Brady charm works only if you have stock in Botox.

For the final game against the Dolphins, it is not a question of who will play—but for how long?  The last nightmare of Bill Belichick is seeing the dice roll over his starters once more.

Every week this season, one of his starters and primary cogs in the machine has become a ghost in the machine.

Playing on your Etch-a-Sketch on the sidelines cannot make Xs where Os now stand.

Bill Belichick has called up the reserves so often that no one is on the taxi squad to pay the fare for a drive home after parties on New Year’s Eve.

What is this? Cleveland?

You almost expect Johnny Manziel to show up and cover for Tom Brady to protect him for the Super Bowl. No loss if he is sacked.

The Patriots want home field advantage, but someone should tell them there is no free lunch in America. You have to pay for it one way or another.