No Whitewash at Gillette Stadium

DATELINE: Goodell’s Follies


Not since President Nixon declared there’s be no whitewash at the White House have we been so disillusioned. It looks like the NFL has found skullduggery while looking for deflated footballs. And, they have fired a member of their own staff.

It appears that Mr. Kraft (all the sycophants call him that) may not be a cheater after all. He is still waiting for an apology from the vindictive administrator at NFL headquarters who used to work for the Jets.

Word has leaked out of the NFL version of the Watergate plumbers that Roger Goodell’s hirelings gave the Patriots an illegal ball. They took what the NFL gave them.

This was a handler who put a ringer into the occasional game.

Talk about plausible deniability.

The NFL has found a culprit, and he has worked for the league office (no, change that to the Goodell Group) for years, coming in only on game day to set up the Patriots as the Cheating Dynasty, not to be confused with the Ming Dynasty or Joan Collins’ Dynasty.

We won’t have Bill Belichick to kick around when Roger Goodell is available.

A league official liked to put a special K into the regular game. Oh, not the drug! And heavens, not the cereal. No, the Special K serial cheater was a kicking ball, slipping one past the semi-comatose zebra lackeys of the NFL.

They finally caught up with him at the Pat game plan. It only took the better part of a fake scandal, scapegoating Belichick.

We suspect that no one over at the NFL headquarters will be standing up and offering a handwritten apology on the order of A-Rod.

We give the Patriots credit for finding inventive ways to win games. We give the NFL demerits for being hiring officials who resemble Judge Susan Garsh at the Hernandez trial.

Impartiality and objectivity should be blind, not former Jets administrators.