Young Tom Turkey or Young Tom Brady?

DATELINE: BLITZ TO YOUTH

Tom as Satire

When Tom Brady ran for 17 yards against Miami, he seemed to grow younger with each plodding step. And, eventually, he seemed to pick up steam as he grew young again, magical and breathtaking.

However foolhardy for an old man to run with monsters of the gridiron chasing him, Tom seemed like a character out of the zombie wars. Those creatures with dead souls couldn’t stop him or knock him off his feet.

There are those media insiders who believe Tom Terrific was playing like Tom Turkey. One injury could ruin the Patriot season and Tom’s career. Wife Giselle would not be able to put Humpty Brady together again.

If you think this run back toward the time machine is an accident, you haven’t been following Tom Brady’s career lately. He is on a binge of mineral baths in the Fountain of Youth. He is taking the waters like it was the nineteenth century of his youth all over again.

Tom recently announced he would play till the age of 50 at which time he would become 25 again. With a regimen of sleep, diet, and psychic energy, Tom plans to evolve into a specimen that Dr. Frankenstein wishes he could have created. He may even steal Gronk body parts.

Many NFL fans think it is far more likely that an asteroid will hit the Earth during the Super Bowl than for Tom Brady to transform into a sweet bird of youth.

Those of us Brady observers know that it is more than botox under the wrinkles that is making Tom seem younger than springtime.

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