Celtics Stink Up the Joint in Houston

 DATELINE: HUMOR

EINSTEIN'S PICK

Coach Brad Stevens is Aging Fast

 

After a brilliant first game of the season, the Boston Celtics have reverted to true form. They have hidden their light under a bushel for game #2.

As Larry Bird once said, if you live by the three-point shot, you will die by it too. The Celtics kept shooting from the three-point arc with gay abandon. Alas, the abandon extended across the lineup. There were 21 attempts at 3-pointers in a row with nary a point to be had.

At one point with three minutes left, Brad Stevens had seen enough. He put every scrub on his bench out on the floor. Even if he had played a dozen men at the same time against the Houston Rockets, the red glare already had blinded the Celtics.

The only good point was that the big Patriots game on Sunday overshadowed the pipsqueak game in Houston. No one was thinking basketball on Saturday with football on Sunday. If you can draw a lesson from the first two games, the Celtics are not yet ready for prime time.

We swallowed the earlier guff that the Celtics had a chance (albeit an excellent chance) to pull out this road game and start the season with two victories. We felt we were now ready to buy the Brooklyn Bridge and started looking for realtors. Talk about dumb.

Rajon Rondo had taken the team out for a three-hour lunch to help their bonding the day before. It was his treat, but after this game he looked like Thurston Howell III about to take a three-hour ride on the SS Minnow.

The game was so putrid that Brad Stevens even played Phil Pressey for three and a half minutes. It was like an episode of Two and a Half Men with everyone acting like Charlie Sheen.

Offensive rebounding was truly offensive, and the Celts looked like cads on the rebound.

 

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