You Can’t Fight City Hall, or NFL Referees

 DATELINE: FOLLY

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Blakeman gives Patriots the Finger

It’s that time of year when conspiracy theories abound.

Fifty years ago the murder of a president led to thoughts that a second shooter was on the grassy knoll.

And now the NFL has shot the New England Patriots in the heart for a second time this season. If you believe in plots and diabolical efforts to confound Bill Belichick, the NFL referees are assassins of the cleverest order.

Their yellow flags contain cyanide tablets, and the Patriots are swallowing each one. Clete Blakeman loves to give it to the Patriots.

The referees cost the New England Patriots the game against the Carolina Panthers.

They shoot horses and Patriots, but there must be a law against hunting down roving Panthers.

You know something stinketh when ESPN does not have an obligatory shot of “Mr.” Kraft in the stands to honor him. Mr. Kraft is an honorable man, and if the NFL referees say that the Patriots ought to lose, who can dispute it?

Watching NFL games is now becoming the equivalent of betting on fixed horseraces. We could have profited more from watching Almost Human and The Blacklist. At least those shows bear an uncanny resemblance to reality.

The Biggest Loser has been cross pollinated with Patriots TV games.

Can you trust the NFL to get it right?  “Of course not,” Red Reddington would respond: “NFL referees are a bunch of criminals.”

The scale of the conspiracy may be wider than you suspect. Just ask the Red Sox about obstruction in the World Series.

At least Bostonians can rest assured that referees will not be stealing victories from the Boston Celtics this season. He who steals a Celtics victory steals trash.

We had better put three lanterns in the steeple of North Church this week. Denver is coming—and so are the NFL referees by land, water, and air.

 

 

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