Word is Out on Jason Collins

DATELINE: HUMOR!

 

Jason Collins likely beat a dozen other gay NBA players to the punch. If they came out tomorrow, it would be an anti-climax and with no redeeming social merit.

 

So, we listened to a bunch of closet-case sports commentators and radio talk show hosts, all straight as the gate, as they pontificated about the breadth and depth of their knowledge of gay issues. Only Chris Broussard of ESPN held to the time-dishonored gay bashing of yore.

 

Really, Mary? It was enough to make RuPaul walk off American Idol, or whatever drag show she hosts.

 

Has Jason Collins sucker punched the sports media? He gave his first exclusive interview to no less than George Stephanopoulos. They were both sitting down or the irony of their togetherness might look suspicious. George is shorter than most men.

 

No one asked the really salient questions that most gay men want to know: like is he single? What gay clubs did he frequent in Boston—and how did he manage to stay hidden when he is nearly seven feet tall?

 

Gay men with a passing interest in basketball are suddenly boning up on down-low brothers in the ghetto.

 

We expect that next time we drop by a gay club to trip the light fantastic we shall find numerous Jason Collins tank top jerseys in a variety of team colors. He played for seven different teams in an equal number of cities.

 

Word has it that he is a free agent after this season, and he will be on the open market, available to the highest bidder.

 

Heavens, that sort of thing can get you arrested in some cities.

 

 

 

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